Pride

The collage I have posted above is the comparison between my drinking days and my sober days. As I’m sure you can guess, the top two images are from the drinking days and the bottom two are where I am looking much healthier through sobriety.

Dear Reader,

As my three year Sobriety Birthday is approaching (April16th), I thought it might be nice to repeat to you something I wrote on Facebook, last year, for my two year birthday…

“Today, by some miracle (and I mean that quite literally), I am celebrating two years of continuous and solid sobriety. The first year was insanely tough- it felt as though booze was following me wherever I went. I must admit this last year hasn’t been easy, I still freak out a little around alcohol because I’m afraid of it; of it destroying my life all over again. But I have gained a faith in myself which I never had, especially during active addiction. I respect myself. This is something totally new to me. I am no longer afraid to say that I am immensely proud of myself, instead of consistently- on a daily basis- wanting to take my own life. I wake up in the mornings and I want to get out of bed, and I remember how I got to bed! I am still a human being and we all feel guilty and ashamed sometimes, but, and I truly hope, I will never have to suffer the extent of which I carried guilt and shame around with me when I was drinking. I am excited about life again, and, for that, I could not be more grateful.

Last night I was feeling rather nostalgic and looking through my old Facebook activity. I found this amongst other crap; One of my many, many excuses for refusing to give up drinking:

“What would ever happen to our sophisticated dinner and wine sessions? And drunken scrabble? It would be terrible. I’m planning to keep it up for another week, just to give my body a rest, but there’s no chance I’ll stop all together, it’s too much fun”.

As you can see, I never believed I could go much more than a week without a drink. I surprise myself every day when I get my head on the pillow without having had a drink. And so, by taking this thing one day at a time, I am still here, alive and thriving, two years after my last drink.”

I can promise that I will be writing something similar to you in a matter of weeks now which I am so excited about. It will be like a dream coming true!

x

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